Dialogue translation request

[qurgh]

Here’s a translation and some questions, as there’s limited context to figure out what is actually going on:

> No longer will the Klingon Empire be tormented by the Tribble scourge!
tlhIngan wo’ joy’taHbe’ yIH mIgh
Lit: The evil tribbles will not continue to torture the Klingon Empire

> History will remember this day!
jajvam qaw qun!

> History will look down upon this day.
Is this supposed to be translated literally? Is history above this day and looking down on it? Or is this an idiom? Can you re-say the line without using the idiom? This is not an idiom that Klingon has.

> There is no honor here.
naDev batlh tu’lu’.

> You are too soft, my daughter. Death to the Tribbles!
tlhoy bItun, puqbe’wI’. Heghjaj Hoch yIH!

> You don’t understand!
bIyajbe’!

> Join us, daughter; you dishonor me!
ghomuv, puqbe’; choquvHa’moH!

> We are all dishonored by this. No.
Hoch quvHa’moH Dochvam.
What is this “No.”? It’s not answering a question.

> So be it.
teH.
Not really sure what is happening at this point either.

> Pity the warrior who slays all his foes.
Hoch jaghpu’Daj HoHpu’bogh SuvwI”e’ (yI)vup(jaj)
Is this a command, that people should pity this person, or more like a toast, where they are hoping that people pity those warriors in general? The bits in () will change depending on the answer to this question.

• This reply was modified 1 week, 4 days ago by  qurgh.

[WALTAH]

Thanks qurgh! To answer your questions:

> History will look down upon this day.

Is this supposed to be translated literally? Is history above this day and looking down on it? Or is this an idiom? Can you re-say the line without using the idiom? This is not an idiom that Klingon has.

*Hmm…it’s supposed to be the counterpoint to the “History will remember this day!” line. How about something like “History will remember this day shamefully” or along those lines

> We are all dishonored by this. No.

Hoch quvHa’moH Dochvam.

What is this “No.”? It’s not answering a question.

*The no is like a “i won’t do it” kinda no. I think that would be “Qo'”?

> Pity the warrior who slays all his foes.

Hoch jaghpu’Daj HoHpu’bogh SuvwI”e’ (yI)vup(jaj)

Is this a command, that people should pity this person, or more like a toast, where they are hoping that people pity those warriors in general? The bits in () will change depending on the answer to this question.

*It’s more like a cautionary proverb…Like “a watched pot never boils” kinda thing

[qurgh]

*Hmm…it’s supposed to be the counterpoint to the “History will remember this day!” line. How about something like “History will remember this day shamefully” or along those lines

So more like “When people remember this day, the events will cause them to be ashamed”?

When coming up with English that is going to end up being Klingon, I find it best to directly describe actions, instead of trying to phrase them using English idioms/slang/etc. The idea of “History will remember this day” isn’t something that works in every language, as some would not allow “history” to “remember” as it doesn’t have a mind to store memories in 🙂

*The no is like a “i won’t do it” kinda no. I think that would be “Qo’”?

Then Qo’ would be the correct word to use there.

*It’s more like a cautionary proverb…Like “a watched pot never boils” kinda thing

I get it’s meaning. I’m asking more about the target of the sentence. Are they saying to someone “You should pity the warrior the who slays all his enemies!”, or are they saying it like they are at a party making a toast, “May we pity those warriors who slay all their enemies!”?

[WALTAH]

Yes, “when people remember this day, the events will cause them to be ashamed” is what I’m going for with that line.

Ah, I see what you’re asking now – I think the correct choice would be like a toast

[qurgh]

> Yes, “when people remember this day, the events will cause them to be ashamed” is what I’m going for with that line.

So:

jajvam qawlu’DI’ tuHchoHlu’
When one remembers this day, one will become ashamed

For the previous line, maybe go with:

jajvam qawlu’
This day will be remembered (One will remember this day)

I feel that would be more natural:

Warrior A: jajvam qawlu’!

Warrior B: jajvam qawlu’DI’ tuHchoHlu’!

> Ah, I see what you’re asking now – I think the correct choice would be like a toast

Hoch jaghpu’Daj HoHpu’bogh SuvwI”e’ wIvutjaj
May we pity the warrior that has killed all their enemies

[WALTAH]

Awesome! Thanks so much for your help qurgh!