tlhIngan-Hol Archive: Thu Jul 11 09:32:45 2002
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Re: KLBC Help with phrasing
From: "Steven Boozer" <[email protected]>
> pImlaw' romuluSngan be' porgh.
> I've heard Romulan women are different. (MO ST5 notes)
> ("The Romulan woman's body is apparently different.")
This could also be interpreted as "Romulan women's bodies are apparently
different." A general statement instead of one referring specifically to
the Romulan ambassador.
> Now a stylistic suggestion: As it is, this sentence has three {-lu'}'s
and
> one {-bogh}, all of which can confuse the reader. Think about getting rid
> of one of the passives. Contemporary English uses the passive a lot, but
> my feeling is that Klingon style prefers the active voice. Instead of
> saying "the body was buried", say "they buried the body":
>
> DaHjaj lom lumol.
> Today they buried the body (corpse).
Who are they? I wasn't following the original context. If the "they" is
known, then certainly do this. But don't remove /-lu'/ simply to avoid
"passive voice." /-lu'/ isn't really "passive"; it is explicitly telling
you that the subject is unstated.
SuStel
Stardate 2526.0