tlhIngan-Hol Archive: Sun Jan 06 17:54:20 2002

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jIHvaD qechmey'e' boQubbogh tIbaH

Just throwing some ideas around lately about how Klingons engage themselves
in discourse. I was thinking at one point that it would be cool to send one
of them personal surveys to the list in Klingon, and let people fill it out
in Klingon.... You know, for practice's sake. But then I got to thinking
that such a thing might be misconstrued as being un-Klingon. The reasoning
was, "Why would a real Klingon want to divulge all that information without
good cause, when the enemy could be listening in at any moment." I suppose
we humans go around blindly assuming we have no enemies. Plus, we feel
elated when it appears that other humans might be interested in us, so it
comes naturally to talk about simple stuff like your stats, your favorite X,
Y, or Z, your juicy scandals from your past, which deteriorates into a game
of out-doing each other. I feel strongly that such is not how Klingons
communicate, but I'm at something of a loss for seeing how and why they do
communicate. What's their motivation, besides battle efficiency?

At this point here are some thoughts. There are two categories of things
that are said.

1) Things that clearly need to be said (viz. to achieve their goals)
2) Things that do not clearly need to be said, but are said anyway.

In the first group are some of the following subcategories:
1a) They say things to win over allies.
1b) They say things to attract mates. (Possibly the only *true* linguistic
1c) They say things to intimidate enemies.
1d) They say things to maintain society, e.g. commands, instructions, oaths,
allegiances etc.

In the other category, I can't think of much:
2a) They say things regarding the honor/dishonor of other Klingons, and
maybe of their own honor as well, in some circumstances. But this all kind
of goes along with 1d.
2b) Poetry... We know Klingons have art, but just how "necessary" is art to
society? (Wait, don't try to answer that! It'll take months!)

Ok, so now that I think about it, maybe Klingons would like to fill out a
survey after all, but their answers would be geared less towards, "See how
interesting I am, you guys," and more towards, "See how great my allies and
I are, and how pathetic my enemies are. Bwahahahahaaa!!!!" Ok, who wants to
make up a survey?

Btw, the news is that I'm getting married in four months, but you'll have to
tredge thru my other message to read the full story. {{;)

--Andrew Strader

"Ya know, there's a million fine-looking women in the world, but very few of
them'll bring ya lasagna at work. Most of them'll just cheat on ya."
--Silent Bob

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