tlhIngan-Hol Archive: Fri Dec 20 10:57:09 1996
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RE: KLBC: story, part 7
- From: "David Trimboli" <[email protected]>
- Subject: RE: KLBC: story, part 7
- Date: Fri, 20 Dec 96 17:45:06 UT
December 18, 1996 9:16 PM, jatlh Deborah Kay:
> {pong: malIq}
>
> HIpmey nuDqa' mangHom la'.
> Qu'vam ta'DI', mangHompu' chu'vaD SoQ nI'Ha' nob.
Because we're not sure if you can use {-Ha'} on a verb used adjectivally,
you'd be safer to say {SoQ nI'be'}.
> "nap Qu'raj. peHaD. peghoj. mochpu'ra' tIlobqu'. tIyu'Qo'. tIqaDQo'.
> tImupQo'. chutmeyvam bobIvchugh, rebIj. 'ach moch bomupchugh, rebIjbe'bej.
> juHDaq rengeHqu'. DIbmey boghajbe'chu'. DIS cha'DIch SutaghDI', DIbmey
> bobajlaH. toDujna' boghajchugh, vaj Sulujbe'. DaH tagh muvtay."
> latlhpu' jojDaq qetnIS mangHompu' chu'.
> mangHompu' chu' qIpmeH naQmey lo'.
> ghojmeH tajmey 'uch mangHompu' puS.
> 'oy HeghmoH HevlaHlu'mo', tajmey lujunnISlu'.
I think there's something missing here.
HoHlaHbogh 'oy' SuqlaHlu'mo', tajmey lujunnISlu'taH.
> rInbe' wa' loDHom 'ej yej yotlhvo' qenglu'.
{rIn} is "be finished," not "finish." I think this would be better as
QaplaHbe' wa' loDHom 'ej yej yotlhvo' qenglu'.
> jajvetlh juHDaq chegh.
> muvtay rIn cha' be'nI' 'ej Qub pe'lora, "wanI'meyvam mughuHmoHbe' vav."
rInDI' muvtay, Qub pe'lora . . .
You've got a non-matching prefix and object. It might be all right, but I
prefer
wanI'meyvam vIta'laHmeH mughuHmoHbe' vav.
> Dochmeyvam Qubbogh pe'lora Sov velqa.
> tungHa'meH, ghaHvaD mon velqa. jatlh 'e' chaw'lu'.
jatlh net chaw'be'.
> 'ach jotHa'choH je velqa Qubmo', "bIjwI' 'oH nuq'e'?"
> Do' DuHHa' bIjDaj qelbogh QubtaHghach.
> DaH malIq lutoy'bogh luqIH.
> malIqvaD jatlhpu' la''a', "luj be'nI'pu' vIneHqu'." yajchu'pu' malIq.
> 'ong naSbogh je malIq.
'ong malIq 'ej naS.
> be'nI'pu' bechmoHbej.
> "Qa'Hommey, HItlhej," chaH ra' malIq.
> DuSaQdaq HaDtaHvIS malIq pa'Daj Say'moH chaH.
> cheghDI', paDaj nuD 'ej Say'qu' ghIHHa'chu'bogh pa'.
> rInchu'ta'mo' Qu', belHa'. majQa' jatlhnIS, 'ach pe'vIl be'Hompu' qIptaH
> jachtaHvIs, "buDwI'mey, yIruchqa', yIruchqa'!"
I feel quite certain that you're using {-mey} on {buDwI'} intentionally.
However, may I suggest that malIq would also use clipped Klingon; rather like
talking to pets.
buDwI'mey, ruchqa'! ruchqa'!
> ra'bogh Dochmey pab velqa pe'lora je.
> DuSaQ ghoS be'nI'pu' chaw'DI' malIq.
> pawDI' ram pa'chajDaq benI'pu' lura'lu'.
Get rid of the {pawDI'}. It's not necessary with a time reference. Also, I
don't think you can say {pa'chajDaq be'nI'pu' lura'lu'} to mean this. It
sounds like "The sisters are commanded in their room." Better go for the full
sentence.
ram be'nI'pu' lura'lu', "pa'rajDaq yIjaH!"
> ngaQ lojmIt.
> ja'chuq be'nI'pu'. jatlh velqa, "maluj luneH la''a' malIq je.
> jImulbej 'ej jIbupbe'bej."
> jatlh pe'lora, "bIlugh, 'ach maQaHchuqnIS."
> "pItlh!"
It sounded to me like Velka was telling her sister that the conversation was
over, until I read the English translation. I think {pItlh} is the wrong
choice here. Maybe just {jIQochbe'}.
> Quick questions that pertain to a later part. How can I say {She could not
> look him in the eye}? I know ways around this like {mInDu'Daj pepHa'} or
{yav
> buS mInDu'Daj}, but those aren't exactly right. Also, is {bej} the correct
> verb to use giving the command {look at me}?
I'd say {HIbej} would mean "Watch me as I do such-and-such." {HIlegh} is
probably okay for what you mean. Or how about {HIbuS!}
mInDaj buSlaHbe'.
She could not look him in the eye.
Literally, "She could not focus (concentrate) on his eye."
--
SuStel
Beginners' Grammarian
Stardate 96971.2