tlhIngan-Hol Archive: Mon Sep 23 14:25:22 2013

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[Tlhingan-hol] Story: ghuv = The Recruit - 32

Robyn Stewart (robyn@flyingstart.ca) [KLI Member] [Hol po'wI']



Torg has broken the arms of a Romulan, knocked him down,  and deactivated
his armored suit. What follows is the next story section, then an
explanation and translation. If you're intermediate, read the unassisted
story first, then the explanation. If you're a beginner, the other way
around. If you're an expert, just nitpick or enhance anything that looks
off. Or write a better story!
---
HeghvIpba' romuluSngan. run torgh 'e' SaHbe'chu' jagh. tlhIngan Qob Haj neH.
ghu' tIvqu' torgh. Ho'Du' 'ang, taj leltaHvIS. romuluSngan nach DopDaq, qogh
'emDaq je taj QIn lan torgh. qoy'choH romuluSngan. taj nechmoH torgh 'ej
romuluSngan qogh chev. 'avwI'vaD tevDaj 'ang, ghIq HoH. HeghtaHvIS jagh, 'Iw
SuD mum torgh. ghun 'ej na'. baS ngo' qawmoH wejwa'. belmo' jach torgh.
QI'mo' HoHmeH mIwmey law' ghojpu', 'a may' bel luQIjbe'pu' ghojmoHwI'pu'.
DaH Qu'Daj yaj torgh. romuluSnganpu' HoHlaH 'e' tobnIS. 
---
HeghvIpba' romuluSngan.  There's a suffix I've only used once before in this
story: -vIp = be afraid to "The Romulan is obviously afraid to die."

run torgh 'e' SaHbe'chu' jagh. Two parts "Torg is short" and "The enemy
completely does not care" connected by 'e' meaning that the first part is
the thing the enemy doesn't care about. "The enemy doesn't care in the
slightest that Torg is short." "The enemy doesn't care at all about Torg
being short." English uses many different words to do the same job:
indicating the intensity, certainty, or thoroughness of an action. Just as
you're doing it right to translate "totally demolishes, utterly demolishes,
thoroughly demolishes" all with pejchu', you're correct to translate
something like SaHbe'chu' with "couldn't care less"  or "didn't give a fig"
and not slavishly as "perfectly did not care".

tlhIngan Qob Haj neH.  Three potential verbs here: Qob = be dangerous; Haj =
dread; neH = want. Here Qob is modifying the noun Klingon, and there's
pretty much no way it couldn't be as soon as you reach it. You read
tlhIngan, there's no N5 on it, and tlhIngan is not a timestamp, so you know
that's the object of the sentence. The next word is Qob. That's not a word
that can take an object, so it has to be acting adjectivally. So tlhIngan
Qob is the object. Next word is the verb they are the object of. "He dreads
the dangerous Klingon" Next word could be the verb want. "He wants to dread
the dangerous Klingon," but that doesn't make a lot of sense. Better to
interpret it as merely. "He merely dreads the dangerous Klingon." "He wants
to dread the dangerous Klingon" would not be wrong: it's just weird. If I
wanted to construct such a sentence I would put a verb suffix on neH,
because otherwise people would interpret it as merely.  

ghu' tIvqu' torgh. Basic OVS sentence with an intensifying suffix on the
verb. Go look up the words ghu and tIv if you don't know them. I'll wait.

Ho'Du' 'ang, taj leltaHvIS. "He reveals his teeth, while he gets out his
knife." If you didn't know Ho' you would at least know it was a body part,
from -Du'.

romuluSngan nach DopDaq, qogh 'emDaq je taj QIn lan torgh.  The nach DopDaq
was added in at the last minute, because qogh has two meanings and it was
possible to get the wrong one here. romuluSngan nach Dop = the side of the
Romulan's head; the Romulan's head side. It has a locative on it, so that's
a place. It's anded (with je) to another place: qogh 'emDaq "the area behind
the belt" OR "the area behind the ear". Only one of those two places is also
on the side of a Romulan's head. "Torg places the tip of a knife on the side
of the Romulan's head and behind the ear." Too close for comfort to the
carotid artery.

qoy'choH romuluSngan. "The Romulan starts to plead."

 taj nechmoH torgh 'ej romuluSngan qogh chev. "Torgh causes the knife to
move laterally and he separates the Romulan's ear."

 'avwI'vaD tevDaj 'ang, ghIq HoH.  ghIq = "and then" "He reveals his prize
to the guard, and then he kills him." 

HeghtaHvIS jagh, 'Iw SuD mum torgh. mum = taste, perceive flavour;  "While
the enemy dies, Torg tastes the green blood."

ghun 'ej na'. na' = be salty; ghun = be warm - "It is warm and salty."

 baS ngo' qawmoH wejwa'. wejwa' = flavour "The flavour is reminiscent of old
metal."

belmo' jach torgh. = "Torg cries out in pleasure." No, the Klingon doesn't
say literally "in" but "in pleasure" is the way to say "because of pleasure"
in English.

QI'mo' HoHmeH mIwmey law' ghojpu', 'a may' bel luQIjbe'pu' ghojmoHwI'pu'.
"On account of the military, he had learned many killing techniques, but the
instructors had not explained the pleasure of battle."

DaH Qu'Daj yaj torgh. "Now torgh understands his mission."

 romuluSnganpu' HoHlaH 'e' tobnIS.  "He needs to prove he is able to kill
Romulans."

This scene was gorier before I edited, making it clearer why he is tasting
blood. I decided to rein in the gore for this story. One of my coworkers
asked me what kind of movies I watch (I was telling him about my story). As
it turns out I don't watch gory movies at all. I refuse to. I'll walk out if
it's gory. So how much sense does it make that I like writing gory stories?

- Qov



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