tlhIngan-Hol Archive: Wed Jun 08 16:35:08 2005
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Re: Mr. Charles, revisited
- From: "QeS lagh" <[email protected]>
- Subject: Re: Mr. Charles, revisited
- Date: Thu, 09 Jun 2005 09:34:54 +1000
- Bcc:
ja'pu' juDmoS:
>tIqwIjvo' mIrmeyvam tIteq 'ej HItlhabmoH
maj.
>pay' bIrchoH tIqlIj 'ej choSaHbe'choH
Nice use of {-be'choH} "become not X". Since the original has "You've grown
cold", which is perfective, {bIrchoHpu' tIqlIj} may be better for the first
phrase, but the grammar is OK as it stands.
One thing you do need to remember is that idioms like "her heart has grown
cold" may not be entirely comprehensible to Klingons, so just try and keep
that in mind as you translate.
>qavoqbe'choH 'ach SoHmo'
>'oy'bejtaH tIqwIj riQqu'
majQa'! Again, {-be'choH} is good here - "I stop trusting you", and I like
the use of {rIQqu'} "be badly injured".
Slipping out of BG mode for a second, and into artistic suggestion mode: If
you want to preserve the rhyming structure of this verse, you might be able
to translate the second line as something like {(SoHmo') tIqwIj 'oy'mey'e'
mumejQo'} "(because of you), as for my heart's aches, they will not leave
me".
>tIqwIjvo' mIrmeyvam tIteq 'ej HItlhabmoH
Same as the one above, so comments are unnecessary. {{;)
Savan,
QeS lagh
taghwI' pabpo' / Beginners' Grammarian
not nItoj Hemey ngo' juppu' ngo' je
(Old roads and old friends will never deceive you)
- Ubykh Hol vIttlhegh
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