tlhIngan-Hol Archive: Tue Oct 30 14:33:04 2001
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Re: ghIj
From: "Sean Healy" <[email protected]>
> ngugh mevta' bIlbo. Dochvamvo' jaHtaHghach yoH law' Hoch ta'meyDaj yoH
puS.
> ghIq qaS Dochmey Dun, 'ach bIH ram law' Dochvam ram puS. 'ochDaq nIteb
> loSbogh Qob'a' leghpa' may'na' Suvpu'.
>
> It was as at this point that Bilbo stopped. Going on from there was the
> bravest thing he ever did. The tremendous things that happened afterward
> were as nothing compared to it. He fought the real battle in the tunnel
> alone, before he ever saw the vast danger that lay in wait.
Ah! One of my favorite passages in the book.
> I wasn't sure about the {-pu'} on {Suv} at the end, but I thought it was
> probably necessary, as {ghIq} in the previous sentence changed the
> time-stamp, and I wanted to be clear that this happened before the events
of
> the other sentence.
The /-pu'/ on /Suv/ and the /-ta'/ on /mev/ are both unnecessary, and
possibly incorrect. Don't be tempted to translate English past tense into
Klingon completed aspect. These are simple actions, not completed actions.
Furthermore, the time context on that last sentence isn't /ghIq/, it's
changed when you say /loSbogh Qob'a' leghpa'/ "before he [ever] saw the vast
danger that lay in wait." This is a time context too.
Personally, I think your recasting of the "nothing compared to it" sentence
is excellent.
Here's how I'd modify it:
ngugh mev bIlbo. ghoSqa'ghachDaj yoH law' Hoch ta'meyDaj yoH puS. ghIq qaS
Dochmey Dun, 'ach bIH ram law' ta'vam ram puS. nIteb 'ochDaq may'na' Suv
bIlbo, loSlI'bogh Qob'a' leghpa'.
I've removed the unneeded aspect suffixes. I changed /jaH/ to /ghoS/ for
some taste thing that I can't fully identify. I figure that the REAL verb
suffix you want on the /-ghach/'d verb is /-qa'/: /ghoSqa'ghach/ "resumption
of course." I reordered your last sentence, putting element where they
belong and making the whole thing less confusing, and adding an additional,
and clarifying "bIlbo" where the English doesn't have one, because the
English has to use pronouns where the Klingon doesn't. (And as I've been
saying elsewhere, this isn't considered redundant in Klingon, and this
example is the best reason why.) I also thought that /loSlI'bogh/ would be
good: Smaug was waiting for Bilbo, from Bilbo's perspective. And since
Bilbo was walking down a tunnel toward Smaug's lair, it seems an excellent
use of /-lI'/.
Kudos on using /may'na'/. That was the /mu' pup/ to use here.
SuStel
Stardate 1827.9