- From: Firedrake <[email protected]>
- Subject: Star Trek: Klingon CD-ROM
- Date: Mon, 16 Dec 1996 16:33:50 +0000
Dear "CD-Ron":
I don't read your magazine (sorry, but I'm a "Mac" fanatic), but I was
forwarded copies of some of your writing recently, in regard to your
review of the "STAR TREK: KLINGON" CD-Rom. I find your attitude to be
condescending, belittling, and essentially ignorant. If you had any
interest in or aptitude for language whatsoever, you would understand
that linguists and linguistic fans will study ANY language, whether
"real" or manufactured, just for the joy of wrapping their brains around
a new problem -- something at which you are obviously not terribly
skilled.
You said:
I don't care if you wore Spock ears at your wedding, this is too
much. Star Trek Klingon includes a separate disc so you can
learn
to speak the Klingon language. We're talking words lists,
drills,
quizzes--all the things you groaned about in school. Does this
really mean that somewhere there are a couple of serious dorks
who sit around talking to each other in Klingon? I guess so.
Ms. Aiken has already responded to the effect that we are considerably
more than "a couple." I will grant that I am not an active participant
on the Internet mailing list devoted to the Klingon Language Institute,
but I follow it closely. I hope soon to have the time to devote to the
language.
Chances are good they're not playing the game that came on the
other CDS in this set. In the game you must learn how to be a
proper Klingon. The story is told completely in full-screen
video
that depicts your Klingon buddies as a bunch of partying
frat-rats
who all seem to be played by John Belushi. About once every five
minutes, you have to make a decision. But you don't actually
change the story line. Real boring, real fast.
Indeed, sir? Are you bored because you don't understand it, or because
you never poked your head outside your own little universe to see how
another culture might behave? I'll bet you're one of those people who
goes to Europe and complains because it's not more like home.
Get this only if you are determined to learn a ficticious
language that will immediately identify you as a person who
never
got a date in high school.
Really? I had quite a few, as I recall, and was captain of the
wrestling, baseball, rifle and debate teams at one point or another, as
well as having the lead in the school play and being and honor student.
Of course, that was 25 years ago. Now, I'm simply an
internationally-known lecturer on Celtic studies (look it up -- never
mind -- you'll find it boring; it's another culture), as well as being a
marketing executive for a Fortune-500 company, minister in my church,
and avid weightlifter, martial artist, and marksman. Yep, I'm a real
loser.
As far as my Klingon studies are concerned, I am more honestly
interested in the culture and lifestyle supposed by this conjectural
alien race, in which a person is _accountable_ for his words, and must
stand personally behind them, rather than a pseudonym. In addtion,
concepts such as "honor", "fidelity", and "straightforwardness", which
are apparently alien to you, fascinate me.
Ms. Aiken then responded, after which you wrote:
Don't think I'm not onto your game, Ms. Aiken-or should I say
Ms. Alien? First, some of you innocently translate Hamlet and
Genesis into Klingon, and then-the United States Constitution!
For all we know, the translation might say that Klingon is the
official language of the United States.
Sane people don't speak Klingon!
If you had bothered to actually _look_ at the set, and understand the
Klingon culture as it has been "designed", if you will, you would
realize that calling this many peoples' sanity into question could be
dangerous to your health! You may THINK you're being humorous, but you
have primarily identified yourself as a narrow-minded, microcephalic
waste of skin with delusions of humanity! Sane people don't make a
living passing ignorant judgment on others' lifestyles, sir.
Bluntly, "CD-Ron": GET A LIFE!
Sincerely,
Jim Fox-Davis