tlhIngan-Hol Archive: Fri Nov 19 10:26:21 1993

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changes to Jonah

Some comments on things I changed in Jonah so far:

1) Changed the first verse.  I ran a diff, so old will be preceded by < and
new by >:

< joH'a' SoQ Hev 'amItay puqloD ghaHbogh yona'e', 'ej ja'
> 'amItay puqloD ghaHbogh yona'e' Qum joH'a', 'ej ja'

and similarly in the third chapter:
< joH'a' SoQ Hevqa' yona, 'ej ja'
> yona Qumqa' joH'a', 'ej ja'

This is much better, focusses more on verbs than "the word of God was unto
Jonah": Klingon is, as has been pointed out, a verbal language.

2) replaced {ghIjlu'} with {Haj}, which makes more sense (and fixed the
grammar around it, of course.

3) Adopted a variant of Krankor's suggestion for "Let us cast lots that we
may know on whose account this evil is happening to us":

< 'ej ja'chuq <<nuvmo' maHvaD qaSbogh wanI'vam qab maSovmeH maSuDjaj.>>
> 'ej ja'chuq <<'Ivmo' maHvaD qaSbogh wanI'vam qab 'e' wISovchoHmeH
> maSuDjaj.>>

I still think "'Ivmo'" is better than casting it as a causative, though
Krankor's right that a question can work here.

4) Replaced {Qapghach} with {Qu'}; I wish I'd known that word before!  Also
replaced {nuqvo'} with {nuq[Daq]vo'}; I'm still unsure about it.

5) Replaced {yaS} with {chuQun} in the third chapter.  Another word I wish
I'd known.

6) changed {belHa'qu'moH} to {belHa'qu'} in the beginning of the fourth
chapter.  The {-moH} was extraneous.

7) Krankor's suggestion about using {rovghaH} for the city's population
didn't work; I'd forgotten just what the whole sentence was about and it
didn't fit (it's supposed to say "[the big city] that there are in it more
than 120000 people who don't know their left [hand] from their right
[hand], and many animals".  So instead of just leaving it at 120000 even, I
made it 120000 people and others, thus:

< 'ej nInveymo' veng tInmo', nIHchajmo' poSchajmo' mISbogh cha' netlh [???]
< nuv Ha'DIbaHmey law' je ngaSbogh 'oH pung vIghajbe''a'?>>
> 'ej nInveymo' veng tInmo', nIHchajmo' poSchajmo' mISbogh 
> wa'bIp cha'netlh nuv latlhpu' je Ha'DIbaHmey law' je ngaSbogh 
> 'oH pung vIghajbe''a'?>>

Note that it's {latlhpu'}, meaning additional ones that are sentient, i.e.
more people.  I used the N N je N je method; it may be redundant, but it's
probably not wrong, and I can afford to sound formal.

Keep those comments rolling in.  I'm still shaky on some of it...

~mark

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