tlhIngan-Hol Archive: Fri Dec 03 06:22:43 2010

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Re: wovmoHwI'mey yupma'

R Fenwick ([email protected]) 

ghItlhpu' Voragh, jatlh:
>   DIngwI' mach vIghaj jIH.
>   lamvo' vIchenmoHpu'.
>   QaDchoHpu'DI' 'eHchoH,
>   ghIq DIngwI' vIQujqu'!
 >I thought there would be comments by now!  I guess some people don't recognize
>the "Dreydl Song" ({DIngwI'} "spinner, top".)

I actually did recognise it (though to my everlasting shame I originally have
an episode of South Park to thank for that...), but didn't comment because I
thought it was rather well rendered! I'm reticent about {lamvo'} for the same
reason you are, but due to the pretty strong metric constraints I don't think
I can do much better.

Also, since {'eH} is an exclamation the use of {-choH} on it is jarring. What
about saying {rInchoH} "it becomes accomplished" instead?

taH:
>I'm not happy with how I translated "I made it out of clay" - there being no
>known word for "clay".  {lam yIQ} "mud, wet dirt" or  {lam jeD/Hum} "viscous/
>sticky dirt" didn't feel right and didn't fit the tune.

I'm with DloraH: I understood perfectly what you meant when you used {lam} on
its own. I'd stick with it!

>Yes, I know {-vo'} "from, direction away from" doesn't work like this.  I
>suppose I could have used our all-purpose {-mo'} "due to, because of", but
>that wasn't right either.

True. What do you think of {'oHvaD lam lo'lu'}, then? It's a little too close
to the English idiomatic meaning - "clay was used for it" - for my liking but
it does fit the metre and also end-rhymes with the final line.

QeS 'utlh

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