tlhIngan-Hol Archive: Thu Mar 07 07:25:00 1996

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FW: If Dr. Seuss wrote Star Trek (fwd)


Forwarded Message:
From: sarah stear <[email protected]>
Date: Mon, 5 Feb 1996 11:09:55 GMT 
Subject: FW: If Dr. Seuss wrote Star Trek (fwd) 
To: rob newcombe <[email protected]>

so are you still learning cling on then?
hope you like this poem, i thought it was superb
sarah

Forwarded message:
> 
> 
> If Dr. Seuss wrote for Star Trek: the Next Generation...
> 
> Picard:     Sigma Indri, that's the star,
>             So, Data, please, how far? How far?
> 
> Data:       Our ship can get there very fast
>             But still the trip will last and last
>             We'll have two days til we arrive
>             But can the Indrans there survive?
> 
> Picard:     LaForge, please give us factor nine.
> 
> LaForge:    But, sir, the engines are offline!
> 
> Picard:     Offline! But why? I want to go!
>             Please make it so, please make it so!
> 
> Riker:      But sir, if Geordi says we can't,
>             We can't, we mustn't, and we shan't,
>             The danger here is far too great!
> 
> Picard:     But surely we must not be late!
> 
> Troi:       I'm sensing anger and great ire.
> 
> Computer:   Alert! Alert! The ship's on fire!
> 
> Picard:     The ship's on fire? How could this be?
>             Who lit the fire?
> 
> Riker:      Not me.
> 
> Worf:       Not me.
> 
> Picard:     Computer, how long til we die?
> 
> Computer:   Eight minutes left to say goodbye.
> 
> Data:       May I suggest a course to take?
>             We could, I think, quite safely make
>             Extinguishers from tractor beams
>             And stop the fire, or so it seems...
> 
> Geordi:     Hurray! Hurray! You've saved the day!
>             Again I say, Hurray! Hurray!
> 
> Picard:     Mr. Data, thank you much.
>             You've saved our lives, our ship, and such.
> 
> Troi:       We still must save the Indran planet --
> 
> Data:       Which (by the way) is made of granite...
> 
> Picard:     Enough, you android. Please desist.
>             We understand -- we get your gist.
>             But can we get our ship to go?
>             Please, make it so, PLEASE make it so.
> 
> Geordi:     There's sabotage among the wires
>             And that's what started all the fires.
> 
> Riker:      We have a saboteur? Oh, no!
>             We need to go! We need to go!
> 
> Troi:       We must seek out the traitor spy
>             And lock him up and ask him why?
> 
> Worf:       Ask him why? How sentimental.
>             I say give him problems dental.
> 
> Troi:       Are any Romulan ships around?
>             Have scanners said that they've been found?
>             Or is it Borg or some new threat
>             We haven't even heard of yet?
>             I sense no malice in this crew.
>             Now what are we supposed to do?
> 
> Crusher:    Captain, please, the Indrans need us.
>             They cry out, "Help us, clothe us, feed us!"
>             I can't just sit and let them die!
>             A doctor MUST attempt -- MUST try!
> 
> Picard:     Doctor, please, we'll get there soon.
> 
> Crusher:    They may be dead by Tuesday noon.
> 
> 
> *COMMERCIAL BREAK, COMMERCIAL BREAK
>  HOW LONG WILL THESE DUMB ADS TAKE?*
> 
> 
> Worf:       The saboteur is in the brig.
>             He's very strong and very big.
>             I had my phaser set on stun --
>             A zzzip! A zzzap! Another one!
>             He would not budge, he would not fall,
>             He would not stun, no, not at all!
>             He changed into a stranger form
>             All soft and purple, round and warm.
> 
> Picard:     Did you see this, Mr. Worf?
>             Did you see this creature morph?
> 
> Worf:       I did and then I beat him fairly.
>             Hit him on the jaw -- quite squarely.
> 
> Riker:      My commendations, Klingon friend!
>             Our troubles now are at an end!
> 
> Crusher:    Now let's get our ship to fly
>             And orbit yonder Indran sky!
> 
> Picard:     LaForge, please tell me we can go...?
> 
> Geordi:     Yes, sir, we can.
> 
> Picard:     Then make it so!
> 
> 
>                         THE END

There must be some scope for translating stuff like this ?
There is no WAY that I am anywhere near being up to even starting !
Qapla' nuqHm



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Subject: If Dr. Seuss wrote Star Trek

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