Almost, but not quite. There are a couple of errors here. First, nouns with a type 5 suffix (in this case, -vaD) generally come first in the sentence before the object. The type 4 suffice -wI' means "my" not "her." "puqbe'" is the word for daughter, not son. Also, "much" as "present" is more about putting on a show. So it would work here if you were implying the lady made a bit of a show with her gift, but it wouldn't work if you were just trying to say, "she gave a gift" without more. Keeping your original verb, the grammatical version of the sentence would be:
loDnalDajvaD puqloDDajvaD je nob muchta' be'
Hope that helps and is clear.
(Edited to correct typos.)