tlhIngan-Hol Archive: Sat Jan 21 02:40:54 2012
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Re: [Tlhingan-hol] qo''e' tu'bogh pagh - 'ay' jav
- From: Rohan Fenwick - QeS 'utlh <[email protected]>
- Subject: Re: [Tlhingan-hol] qo''e' tu'bogh pagh - 'ay' jav
- Date: Sat, 21 Jan 2012 20:40:41 +1000
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ghItlhpu' De'vID, jatlh:
> Also, are people okay with me putting all the Klingon in one chunk,
> followed by the English later, as I've been doing, or should I
> interlinear them?
I have no problem with the way you're doing it now.
taH:
> lupDujHom: SeHyaH[1], SD-1-0-3 'oH Dujvam'e', logh vergh chol.
I just used {SeHlaw} in First Contact, but admittedly the context was a
little different (the missile complex in that film is pretty small and
couldn't really be said to have much of a command centre) and I don't
have HQ 8.4.
> logh vergh: SD-1-0-3, NCC-1701-A-vaD *qIrq* HoD ghomDaj je DaHIj net
> chaw'. rIn.
maj.
> VALERIS: meHDaq paw HoD.
> KIRK: peleS. 'Iv Sogh...?[2]
Hm. I see what you're doing here. If {'Iv} is standing in for the verb
(which it can do IIRC) this needs to be {'Iv Sogh'e'}. Otherwise, {Sogh
'Iv} works. Or, since this is in an on-duty context, how about just
{yIngu''egh, Sogh!}?
> [2] - Again with the backward order from English so I can't cut off in
> the right place.
Heh, yes, I ran into this problem a couple of times. :)
> VALERIS: *valerIS*, qaH. DeghwI' DapoQ net ja' vaj jISap.
> SPOCK: Sogh, qaleghqa'mo' QaQ ghu'. 'ampaSDaq HaDpu'DI' Sogh,
> lutlhejbogh mangHom'e' ghaH nIv law' Hoch nIv puS. ta'vam chavbogh
> vulqangan wa'DIch ghaH.
maj.
> KIRK: bIHemqu'bej.
I don't think Kirk's line is quite this strong; perhaps {bIHembej qar'a'}.
> VALERIS: 'e' vIHarbe', qaH.
> McCOY: vulqanganna' ghaH.
majQa'. Beautifully put. :)
> KIRK: Ha'. Delaq Do'. .... *SI'qotIy*?
> SCOTT (ghogh): lu', qaH.
He's not responding to an order here, so I think {lu'} is inappropriate,
though I don't believe {Su'} or {'eH} are really right either. {qaQoy},
perhaps?
> KIRK: jonta' pa' DaSam'a'?
> SCOTT (ghogh): DaqDaq vIlanpu'boghDaq vISam, qaH.[3]
Ugh. I agree, that's wrong. This is a tough one to translate and I think
Klingon is simply not capable of doing it exactly. What you're really
saying is "I found it in the place in which I left it", and Klingon
relative clauses can only access subjects and objects; there's no way to
make any other noun the head of a {-bogh} clause.
How about a recast? Maybe {naDev vIlanpu' 'ej naDev vISamqa'} "I put it
here and I've found it here again"?
> KIRK: SuH. *'uHura*, vergh pIn HIrI'.[4]
I've always thought the prefix trick was underused in Klingon - often
it's only used with verbs that we could do the same thing for in English.
{vergh pIn HIrI'} is fine.
> UHURU: HevtaH SeHyaH, qaH.
Might {HevbeH} be a better rendering?
> KIRK: SeHyaH, 'entepray' maH... mamej 'e' yIchaw'.
> vergh ghogh: SeHyaH maH. 'entepray', Sumej net chaw'. vergh lojmIt
> boSIchmeH wejmaH lup boghaj.[5]
I'll let Qov handle the piloting lingo. :)
As for the using {'entepray' maH} and {SeHyaH maH}, I think they're fine.
Later on Uhura says "Ursva maH" to the Morskan guard post for "We are
[the ship] Ursva", and though her Klingon was written as intentionally
bad, I think it's the only example of such a phrase we have to go on.
> VALERIS: wIwaQHa'lu'choH.[6]
I understood it as a command (to the crew, to the crew of the spacedock -
who knows?) to release the moorings, which I guess would be retractable
conduits or airlocks that allow people to move between the ship and the
spacedock. But I don't think it's a problem if it's not an order. Watch
your suffix ordering, though - {wIwaQHa'choHlu'}.
> KIRK: DaqvamDaq vergh lojmIt wIloStaH.
{wIloSlI'} might be better.
> vergh ghogh: Huvbej SumejmeH He.
> VALERIS: 'o' chuyDaH.
> KIRK: maj. Sogh, cha'maH vagh Hong.
> VALERIS: HoD, ngochmo' verghDaq chuyDaH neH lulolu' 'e' qaqawmoHneS.[7]
{lulo'lu'}. Otherwise, majQa'. I like what you've done with {-neS}; it
communicates exactly what you intend.
> SPOCK: [tuSlaw']
> McCOY: *jIym*?
(Why not just {jIm}?)
> KIRK: qara'chu'ta' 'e' DaQoy, Sogh.
> VALERIS: lu', qaH.
maj.
QeS 'utlh
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