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FW: Stuck On The Island...




> [Original Message]
> From: <[email protected]>
> To: Subscriber <[email protected]>
> Date: 5/26/00 8:04:37 AM
> Subject: Stuck On The Island...
>
>    Jokes4U - May. 26                               
>
> HTML Edition
>  May. 26th    
>
>   
>
>       Stuck On The Island...         
>
>   
>
>          
>
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> Stuck On The Island 
>
> An ambitious yuppie finally decided to take a vacation. He booked
> himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his
> life... until the boat sank! The man found himself swept up on the
> shore of an island with no other people, no supplies... Nothing. Only
> bananas and coconuts. 
>
> After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the
> most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to him.
>  In disbelief he asks her: "Where did you come from? How did you get
> here?" 
>
> "I rowed from the other side of the island," she says. "I landed
>  here when my cruise ship sank." 
>
> "Amazing," he says. "You were really lucky to have a rowboat wash up
> with you." 
>
> "Oh, this?" replies the woman. "I made the rowboat out of raw
>  material that I found on the island; the oars were whittled from gum
> tree branches; I wove the bottom from palm branches; and the sides
> and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree." 
>
> "But-but, that's impossible," stutters the man. "You had no tools or
> hardware. How did you manage?" 
>
> "Oh, that was no problem," replies the woman. "On the south side of
> the island, there is a very unusual strata of alluvial rock exposed.
> I found that if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it
> melted into forgeable ductile iron. I used that for tools and used
> the tools to make the hardware. 
>
> The guy is stunned. 
>
> "Let's row over to my place, " she says. 
>
>   
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>
> After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf.
> As the man looks onto shore, he nearly falls out of the boat. Before
> him is a stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue
> and white. While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven
> hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb-struck. 
>
> As they walk into the house, her beautiful breasts bouncing with
>  each step, she says casually, "It's not much, but I call it home.
>  Sit down please; would you like to have a drink?" 
>
> "No thank you," he says, still dazed. "Can't take any more coconut
> juice." 
>
> "It's not coconut juice," the woman replies. "I have a still. How
>  about a Pina Colada?" 
>
> Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts, and they sit
> down on her couch to talk. 
>
> After they have exchanged their stories, the woman announces, "I'm
> going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take
> a shower and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the cabinet in the
> bathroom." 
>
> No longer questioning anything, the man goes into the bathroom.
> There, in the cabinet, is a razor made from a bone handle. Two shells
> honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened onto its end, inside of a
> swivel mechanism. "This woman is amazing," he muses. 
>
> "What next?" 
>
> When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but vines and a shell
> necklace-strategically positioned-and smelling faintly of gardenias. 
>
> She beckons for him to sit down next to her. 
>
> "Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "we've
> been out here for a very long time. You've been lonely. I've been
> lonely. There's something I'm sure you really feel like doing right
> about now, something you've been longing for all these months? You
> know... " She stares into his eyes. 
>
> He can't believe what he's hearing. His heart begins to pound. He's
> truly in luck: "You mean...", he gasps, "...I can actually check my
> e-mail from here??" 
>
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